"When I was young I set out to change the world.
When I grew older I perceived that this was too ambitious,
so I set out to change my state.
This too, I realized as I grew older, was too ambitious,
so I set out to change my town.
When I realized that I could not do even this, I tried to change my family.
Now, as an old man I know that I should have started by changing myself.
If I had started with myself, maybe then I would have succeeded
in changing my family, the town, or even the state-
and who knows, maybe the world."
(unknown)

April 01, 2008

Make Your Answer! ..at your own risk


Recent ice-breaking party for Monash postgraduate students on 24th March 2008 I attended has given me back a short term feeling of a student. It was FUN because of the teamwork games and would be more excited if I’m really a student. The party reminded me again that I have delayed LOOOONG time.. Also reminded me a question of mine that nobody cares at all, to answer or to offer hand or even have a confirmed requirement or period (which I was so naive to think there is initially, as being promised) – When can I become a postgraduate student? haha.. when can I start a real training?

Holiday has to be taken for big reason.. And I met a friend who is doing PhD (going 3rd year). She has just ‘FLY’ for 3 months internship in oversea this week, while I’m still just wishing to ‘fly’.. Together in a dinner, another she (going 3rd year) just finished and came back from an internship in oversea for 6 months. We all were course-mate in undergraduate but they stayed for postgraduate. Best wish to them! Then, I looked back to myself.. What am I doing? I thought I have been very clear with goals but at that moment, I was wondering.. haha!

The reason for the break was the bad news of my blood test, which showed the return of the VIRUS!!! I thought I have recovered and I have almost forgotten its (virus) threatening; however it was just a beginning. This time I won’t simply loosen up my defense and the wills to eradicate the virus once and for all. Nevertheless, the return of the king (virus) has its good and serves as a PERFECT signal.. because I have to LET GO something, which used to be a difficult decision. What a good say, "及时放下，机会难得"。I think I know what it means.. I feel very light now, just similar during Aikido training.. if you relax, your mind and body can have full extension, thus become stronger! NOW, the main concern is HEALTH first!

After all, this is one thing I learned: If nobody have (cares) the answer for the never-seem-ending QUESTION (like my case above), then I make my answer – NOW! It's just I learned slow a little bit.. Well, in the meantime of a LOOOONG holiday, there are a lot more I MUST do quick! Simple wish only, I just want to be STUDENT.. (as my first milestone in career aspect).

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